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Pilates vs. Pirates

January 2, 2008

Caroline goes to pilates classes every now and then. That’s all fine and dandy, but I kind of wish she’d go to pirates classes as well (if there were such a thing).

Sidenote: Japanese people (who have difficulty distinguishing between the spoken “r” and “l”) would have a tough time when signing up for either of those classes.

Class Signup Person: Sir, which class would you like to attend?
Takamura-san: Pilates please.
CSP: I’m sorry, is that pirates or pilates?
Takamura-san: Yes, pilates.
CSP: Could you please be more clear?
Takamura-san (stretches his arm as if he’s holding a scabbard): Pilates!
CSP (sighs)

5 Comments leave one →
  1. Josh permalink
    January 2, 2008 4:29 pm

    Don’t you know the difference between seltzer and salsa? You have the seltzer after the salsa!

  2. Andrew permalink
    January 2, 2008 9:28 pm

    When Frederic was a little lad he proved so brave and daring,
    His father thought he’d ‘prentice him to some career seafaring.
    I was, alas! his nurs’rymaid, and so it fell to my lot
    To take and bind the promising boy apprentice to a pilot –
    A life not bad for a hardy lad, though surely not a high lot,
    Though I’m a nurse, you might do worse than make your boy a pilot.

    I was a stupid nurs’rymaid, on breakers always steering,
    And I did not catch the word aright, through being hard of hearing;
    Mistaking my instructions, which within my brain did gyrate,
    I took and bound this promising boy apprentice to a pirate.
    A sad mistake it was to make and doom him to a vile lot.
    I bound him to a pirate – you! – instead of to a pilot.

    I soon found out, beyond all doubt, the scope of this disaster,
    But I hadn’t the face to return to my place, and break it to my master.
    A nurs’rymaid is not afraid of what you people call work,
    So I made up my mind to go as a kind of piratical maid-of-all-work.
    And that is how you find me now, a member of your shy lot,
    Which you wouldn’t have found, had he been bound apprentice to a pilot.

  3. Jamey Stegmaier permalink
    January 3, 2008 12:17 am

    Pirates of Penzance, perhaps?

  4. Bob permalink
    January 3, 2008 10:01 pm

    Interestingly enough, though I’ve never done pilates, I have done pirates.

    In 2003 I was a resident assistant for the Missouri Scholars Academy, a sort of three-week governers school for rising high school juniors across Missouri.

    We had a few exercise activities every morning led by the RA’s, and to spice things up one morning, the RA who led occasional pilates sessions coordinated with the schedule maker and had the intentional misprint – pirates – printed in the daily schedule.

    And wouldn’t you know, two other RA’s dressed up as pirates and came into the room snarling “Arrghhh, shiver me timbers, where’s the pirates?” (pronouncing it pie-rah-tees, of course)

    Good times. I highly recommend it.

  5. Jamey Stegmaier permalink
    January 5, 2008 5:17 pm

    Good story, Bob–that’s a fortuitous misprint.

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